Sunday, December 23, 2012

Learn to love what you have now

Every now and then, I got a lot of people telling me things, like....

"Hi, I have an appointment with you to discuss about this project."
"You are?"
"I'm Keny... "
"Oh, I thought you are a guy..."

Even when I receive phone calls....

Me: "Hello?"
"Oh, sorry. Is Mr. Keny there?"
"This is Keny.."
I can hear the person whispered to the person next to him, "How come it's a girl?"

And the very common case...

You are Keny? Your name sounds like a guy.... 

I........... I don't know what to say.. lol

It never happen to me before. These things started to hit me when I came to Singapore. I was a bit shock. There are a lot of people telling me that my name sounds like guy. I'm not talking about one or two.. or ten... I'm talking about almost 50 people. One out of 5 person will tell me the same thing.

"Oh? I don't know that you are a girl..."

"I thought Keny is suppose to be a guy's name.."

At first, I thought, ok... That's not a big thing. But when a lot of people started to telling me the same thing, I got a lil bit annoyed. I mean, ok that's fine if you thought that I'm a guy.. But now that I'm standing here in front of you, you shouldn't be telling me this kind of thing. Stop adding those unnecessary comments "OMG, I thought you are a boy. Wow, I thought Keny is suppose to be a guy's name. I think your dad wanted a boy." Do I look like a guy to you? Obviously I'm not. Nobody ask your opinion la. Shut the fuck up.

Because of this, I asked few of my Indonesian friend. "Does my name really sounds like guy's name?"
They said, not really. Most of them think that it doesn't sounds like guy's name. So, I would conclude that, in my country, Keny is not a stereotype of a guy's name. BUT, In other country maybe it is. That's why people already have a mind set that I'm a guy when they heard my name. Further, my friend's boyfriend's name is Kenny. Oh god why........

When I was annoyed, I asked myself, why does this happen to me? I'm suppose to be a beautiful and sweet girl (you can puke if you want to, that's alright). I hate my name. My parent's could have pick me a cute name, like............. I don't know. I can't think of any.. Maybe like Snow(?) or Queenie.. lol.

But then I thought, why should I? I mean, when people say that my name sounds like guy's name, nothing serious happen. I didn't loss any of my legs, I didn't grow penis just because of that.. Why should I be annoyed? I can just ignore them and accept this as my routine.

So, one day.. I started to accept this. I feel that, why should I hate this name? Let's just think that this is a unique name. Yah! why not? Not many people have this types of name, right?

Ever since then, I start to love my name more and more. Keny Coangharja. In this world there's only one person who named Keny Coangharja, and that person is me! Instead of being sad because people telling me things that's not important and totally useless, I feel that it's more important for me to hold on to things that make me happy.

Instead of being sad and angry all day that has no benefit at all, you should find something positive from things that happened. The very common one is, I'm glad that I'm a live.

You are sick? Be thankful that you are still alive. You are healthy! Be thankful that you are healthy, you can enjoy all of the good food, go to anywhere you want. You are sad? Be thankful that there's someone who still love you unconditionally, like your parents. You are ugly? Be thankful that you are not disabled. You are disabled? Don't loss hope. Be thankful that you are still alive.

Don't spend half of your life complaining and thinking how sad you are. Everyone have their own value. Find this one thing that you have inside that can make you happy. Love yourself. Be thankful of what you have now.

Another story....

Once upon a time.. lol
Cut the bullshit, there's this one lady who always say that she is useless. She said that her hand is useless. She complain about her husband didn't love her, her everyday job is cooking at the kitchen. "I worked so hard, but no one appreciate me. I don't need my hand. My hand is useless. Nobody appreciate my work anyway"

So, one day this lady was cooking in the kitchen. She was preparing to pour a pot of hot oil to another container. She accidentally dropped the oil and she slipped and fell on the floor. My god, her hand accidentally went into the pot of hot oil. Because she was fat, she can't move her body immediately.

She was rushed to the hospital. Her hand was almost cooked. I really can't imagine how it looks like. But I saw her hand few days ago, the scar looks kinda terrible.

From there, she learn to appreciate what she have. She said, because she never appreciate it, that's why it was almost taken away from her.

I hope you learn something today..
Love what you have now. You never know what will happen the next day.. You can never know when things will be taken away from you. The time is now.

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